The Two People Living Inside You

We spend a lot of time trying to ‘find ourselves.’ The irony is that we cannot find something that is barely there. We are not ourselves, completely. It is a soft, comforting, and liberating truth that we are a work in progress, not a finished product. We are so much more than what we know and even dare to imagine.

As Dan Gilbert, in his TEDx talk- The Psychology of Your Future Self, says, we often hear people say that they ‘can’t even imagine’ something happening in the future. The resistance to change is so deeply ingrained that our brain chooses to believe in the illusion of constant comfort over the reality of unavoidable change. This is the illusion that traps most of us; we forget that the future can change us just as dramatically as the past did. Dan calls it the ‘End of History Illusion.’

Our future self might crave experiences we fear today. We may love what we dismiss, walk away from what we cling to, or care deeply about something we barely notice now. And that’s not inconsistency, that’s growth.

This is why the choices we make today matter. Not because we must perfectly plan our life, but because we should leave room for the person we’re still becoming. Choose goals that allow flexibility. Build relationships that can evolve. Make decisions that don’t box the next version of us.

When we honor our future self, we live with more intention today.

So instead of saying, “This is just who I am,” let’s try asking: Who might I become? And how can I make life easier for that person?

Because our future self is real and it’s counting on us.

To improve is to change, so to be perfect is to have changed often. - Winston Churchill

Credits

Oshi Shrivastava

2025-27